In a bold and unexpected move, KNBR made up some lame Happy Memories Everything's OK bullshit for today's afternoon show with Rod "Hack" Brooks leading the anemic corporate stooge charge. Something about presents that need batteries, batteries not being included, and his holiday pleasure being severely disrupted as a result. That was punctuated by four commercial breaks with some repetitive "Let's have some fun, but we don't censor calls, we can still talk about sports!" line that, as of 54 minutes into the broadcast, had resulted in absolutely no talk about sports.
The general Christmas spirit of the broadcast suggests that WarriorsRadio instructed its on air personalities to not talk about the Warriors. At all. Besides the Ray Ridder/Bob Shitzgerald lovechild of injury woes and, um, the Milwaukee Bucks? All the while, Rod diligently rattled off a list of as many shitty Bay Area franchises as he could think of, minus the Sharks, in order to downplay that
1. Everyone already stopped giving a fuck about the Raiders
2. The 49ers canned the fucking asshole and are moving forward after it ushered in marked IMPROVEMENT!
3. Bay Area Baseball is not and has never been about winning and everyone knows it, and
4. The Warriors' incredible suck is the news but there's no fix and it's intentional, not established bat shit crazy sea monster senile (Al Davis), cruel and incompetent but willing to admit mistakes (Yorks), under new ownership/management (Giants), run by an actual genius and potentially relocating to a flush market under relatively new ownership interests (A's). It's 15 years of unwavering anti-success under the watch of a complete buffoon NBA mind and his anal retentive bean-counter minions and PR whores. No contest. But KNBR is not allowed to actually talk about it until only non-paying fans are awake and/or listening.
I don't know what Bob was going for from his kitchen yesterday (apparently he got in a little late from Miami after his beautiful call of The End last night, so he phoned it in doubly today), but he never mentioned the words Brandan Wright or Restraining Order. So everything must be OK. Rod Brooks does not read, so I can understand him not mentioning Ric Bucher. But Bob had no choice. He'd be canned if he bothered having a pulse or a relevant insight. Not his fault.
The basic idea from WarriorsRadio is this:
Don't feel bad about wasting your money, in this wintry economic climate, on an unwatchable, uncompetitive steaming pile of monkey shit and "Salary Protection." It's OK, we're just waiting on the recoveries of our core vets, Jackson, Maggette, and Crawford- two of whom are actively seeking trades out of town, but the core is the core!- and this Friday, they will ALL suit up (with Monta Ellis if you believe Some Guy) so the pummeling at the hands of the Boston Juggernaut is THAT much more depressing and exciting!!!
So come on down, it's a great time out!